Jenny Everywhere and the Perils of the Free Market

The man stood upon the rooftop shrouded in darkness. Jenny Everywhere stood opposite him.

“Jeff the Economist, I presume,” she said, smiling pleasantly, hands in pockets. She could smell the figure’s cologne, stately, overpowering, rolling over her in waves with the waifish wishes of the wind. His suit was cut so sharp you could slice bread with it, and so black it would have been indistinguishable from the overcast nighttime sky had it not been haloed by the lights of the city.

“Jenny Everywhere,” he smiled, voice harsh and nasal, every syllable said with a sneering upper-class intonation, “How… unfortunate that we should meet at such a financially apposite time.”

“Oh, come on,” said Jenny, “What the hell does that mean?”

Jeff the Economist laughed a mirthless laugh, laced with danger, eyes flashing in the light of the world.

“It means, my dear Jennifer, that the, hm, removal of certain, shall we say, liabilities to the company would not have any great impact on the finances of the Altern Corporation at this time,” he smiled.

Jenny blinked.

“You’re really not being very clear here,” she said, “But somehow I’m getting the impression you want to murder me.”

“Well,” said Jeff, “We, on behalf of the corporation, do admit that, when put like that, it does seem somewhat unpleasant, but we have no doubt that all parties involved will find this unfortunate transaction a beneficial experience, and ultimately we are highly concerned that your experiences with Altern be nothing but pleasant.”

“Oh, fuck this,” muttered Jenny, and punched him, body arcing to connect with his rather uncomfortably bony nose, which for a moment painfully dug into her knuckles before falling away.

Jeff the Economist descended from the building in what Jenny thought to be a decidedly unrealistic manner. Terror glinted in his eyes, and she idly wondered how many he had killed. She whistled softly, and felt the air blowing through her mouth as a dull thud resounded below. She closed her eyes.

The wind stroked and patted her face as she strolled nonchalantly down the building and back to her home by the light of the moon.

Just a short silly-ish thing. Jeff the Economist comes from Jazz Nevermore’s series of Jenny comics, and I had the idea when Jeff first appeared but never finished this until now, so here we are. And now, the formalities...

The character of Jenny Everywhere is available for use by anyone, with only one condition: This paragraph must be included in any publication involving Jenny Everywhere, that others might use this property as they wish. All rights reversed.

The Altern Corporation is also available for use by anyone with only one condition: This paragraph must be included in any publication involving the Altern Corporation, that others might use this property as they wish. All rights reversed.